Why does it take so long to decide to Downsize?
We know from experience that downsizing, especially the decision to do it, can take years.
You start by trying to justify why you need to stay:
- When the last child goes to university, you’ll need to stay there, so she can come back.
- Then when she doesn’t come back straight away, you have to talk yourself into staying, just in case. You must stay, as all the family comes over at Christmas.
Everyone justifies it, we see it all the time. Interestingly, if you’ve been left property by a close family member this can also cause you to re-evaluate and procrastinate all at the same time. That’s ok.
Worry & Decision Making
Remember you are not alone, considering a downsize takes a while before you are set on moving. Last week we spoke with a client who said that even though she was “fortunate to have a load of choices over whether to stay or move,” she was still “very worried of making the wrong decision”, thus preventing her from actually taking any action what so ever.
If you see downsizing as a worry, your decision making is impacted. As your worry increases your ability to decide decreases, which is why we have the to and fro in our minds for a long time. It’s completely normal. This chart shows this, does this sound like you?
Everyone feels the same. The comfort of how you are, especially if you’ve been in your home for a long time, it can often be overwhelming.
How to overcome this:
1 – Make a list of Pro’s and Cons – This will help you weigh up and see what you stand to gain IF you move
2 – Think of it as a positive move – write down all the things you will gain IF you move (try our mind-set blog here)
3 – Remember that Worry is living in the future, (a little insight from a book I’m reading called You are a Badass) – It struck me as right, worry is negative over things you can’t control OR things you don’t know will or won’t happen
4 – Enjoy where you are right now. If you are not enjoying it, maybe a move is right.
5 – Pinpoint what the source of the worry is, then work out IF it’s true. I learned this from a mind-set coach: Take the client we met recently. She was worried she’d make the wrong decision and not like the outcome. This is also known as FEAR.
- 1 – Is this true? (Will you make the wrong decision) – No, she hasn’t moved yet and so she doesn’t know. (She may love it)
- 2 – Can you find anyone that you know that has made the wrong decision? Usually there is very few people in this category
- 3 – Can you find anyone whom have moved and it was the right decision? Usually this list will be longer.
This shows that there is a strong possibility that you will move and it will be better for you. Fear of making the wrong decision could stem from you thinking too hard about the ultimate goal, (whatever that may be for you). But moving house is only part of the steps you need to take to get to that goal, so if you have lots of mini steps, if one isn’t quite working you can change it. There is less risk this way, it is way more manageable too.
Hopefully something to think about.
A sympathetic ear and a cup of tea
If you feel that this is perhaps where you are now, we are available to help talk things through. It doesn’t always have to mean that moving is right for you now or soon. Talking it through to someone who can see things from the outside can usually be a comfort. Katie and I are always available to come and see you, when you are ready. A cup of tea and a chat can lift the burden of a decision, and we are also really lovely too! Call me direct on 01524 230722
The freedom & Lifestyle Chat
You might not be ready to pursue even this possibility yet, James, my personal financial advisor helps many of my handpicked clients and has opened his diary for us on many occasions. He’s wonderful, kind and very relaxed about everything. He’ll help guide you to make the decision that works for you, or even just check you are on the right path. He’s wonderful. Catch him on 01524 849955 and let him know I sent you.
Whatever you are concerned about, whatever your next step is, it’s okay to ask us anything. We love helping each family make the right decision to suit them. Even if it means that you stay just where you are.
Have a wonderful week
P.S If this has got you motivated to begin the process of downsizing have a read of this one too!